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CalRizzo: @bzgirl Love love LOVE that twitter! How would you like to see that as a movie by Universal? DM me with your name to sign over copyright.

smackfilms: @bzgirl LOL, great tweet! Smack in the Box Films would love to produce, and we'll even fly you out to hang with Michael Cera! DM to agree.

CalRizzo: @smackfilms Go play with the other children while I bring home the real talent.

CalRizzo: @bzgirl Want to work with the Lonely Island guys on a summer rom-com? We can hook that up! And we'll top any other studio's offer by $500!

smackfilms: @bzgirl We'll pay you $2 million! But not even $500 more.

CalRizzo: @smackfilms Yeah right. Show her the money.

smackfilms: @CalRizzo Ooh, timely. Quick, ask me if that's my final answer!

CalRizzo: @bzgirl Been five minutes and haven't heard back! Hope you aren't playin' hard to get! Hope it's ok if I check your FB.

CalRizzo: @bzgirl Hey can you tell me which of these girls is you? Don't wanna message the wrong teen heh heh

smackfilms: @bzgirl Sent you a Bebo message, hit me back girl! You know how we do.

CalRizzo: @smackfilms Sooooo she's black.

CalRizzo: @bzgirl Think I found yr FB, says you're a fan of the environment! Did you know that Universal is on the way to going carbon-neutral by 2014

smackfilms: @CalRizzo Did you know it takes 10,000 gallons of water just to shut you the hell up?

CalRizzo: You go to ducking hell.

smackfilms: Ha ha, look at Mr. "I haven't taught my iPhone to say fuming!"

CalRizzo: ROFL duck you fat-fingers

smackfilms: @bzgril Just found we can take this project way bigger if we greenlight by EOD. You in? DM me girrrrl!

CalRizzo: @smackfilms Good, maybe now there's room for your head. BTW you can keep tweeting "bzgril" while I tweet the actual person

smackfilms: Shot! Shot shot shot shot shot god dim it

CalRizzo: "Mr. Bond, allow me to put you in a film deal that doesn't work." "Do you expect me to talk?" "No, I expect you to go bankrupt."

CalRizzo: @bzgirl We own the rights to "Radio Gaga," I see that's your fave song

smackfilms: @CalRizzo Hey Grandpa Rizzo, she loves Lady Gaga.

bzgirl: @justin bieber wuts yr fave kehsa song

CalRizzo: @smackfilms Holy shot what was that

smackfilms: @CalRizzo God damn it, wait, the first one was a retweet

CalRizzo: @smackfilms Abort! Abort! Hey, how's the Angry Birds Rio deal?

smackfilms: @CalRizzo Decided it's not a very American story, passed it off to Miramax.

CalRizzo: @smackfilms You ads.

Illustration: Edited from a photo by Vale Blos