sexy bandzAs someone who is neither a parent nor eight years old, I have no idea if Silly Bandz are still all the rage among children.

I do know that the toy is in the same vein as slap bracelets, Pogs, Tamigotchi, and Pokemon. Something I don't remember, however, is adults making "sexy" versions of my childhood toys. I mean, granted, there probably wasn't much leeway in terms of turning a Pog Slammer into something dirty (although "Pog Slammer" is an amazing porn name). And yet, somebody's decided that Silly Bandz needs a sexualized version for grown-ups who want to wear penis-and-boobie-shaped cheap jewelry on their wrists because, as it's asked in the ad for My Sexy Bandz (NSFW), "why should kids have all the fun?"

Answer: because Silly Bandz are for kids. Look, if you're going to throw a bachelor/ette party, there's always penis and boob-shaped pasta. And isn't that enough?