12.08.10 - 8:00AM
- by
Nick Douglas

Half of All People Wipe Sitting Down, Half Wipe Standing. Internet Reveals Horrible Truth to All

topic:
Blogstorm
Weird
Science

Did you know that half of all people wipe their butts in a different way than you? Some stay seated and some stand. (I'm guessing most girls sit, actually.) And until now, no one knew that their way wasn't universal.

Three years ago, a guy named Kev Kage posted about this phenomenon on CollegeHumor. The piece got a couple hundred comments, and then not much attention (as far as I can tell), until last night it landed on Reddit and got front-paged.

And now, because bloggers always copy Reddit, soon the world will know that half of their friends wipe the wrong way, a way that seems foreign and baffling. Everyone will be asking intimate relations to demonstrate their stance. I know this because my girlfriend and I, bewildered and a little defensive, just carried out this cultural exchange.

You think you know a person.

link:// Standing vs. Sitting: How Do You Wipe?
via:// Reddit

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12.08.10

By LouF

Neutral

What the hell is the matter with you? At what point did you decide to devote your life to informing the public about ass-wiping practices.

Your site sucks. Shut it down.

12.08.10

By HR DR

Neutral

Y U MAD THO?

12.08.10

By Chris Menning

Neutral

I, for one, appreciate knowing that half of people out there are wiping their asses in a different manner than I do. It's the differences that make us special. ;)

12.08.10

By LouF

Lowest Rank

Bull. If you weren't the author's sockpuppet, you wouldn't be here.

This is your idea for a website? You take things that users post on other sites and repost them here? And you don't even have the good sense to choose decent material to steal?

Seriously, shut down this site. It was a stupid idea.

12.08.10

By Jordono Bruno

Neutral

Then leave, and never come back. The Internet would probably be better off without you. This is a great site for keeping up with the latest fads on the Internets. Not everybody scours all the sites this information comes from to find the new memes. Plus, this site offers direct links to the sites, videos, or articles in question, and I always click them to give them a "view" and enjoy the humor of Urlesque.

12.08.10

By LouF

Neutral

Yes, this is a great site for keeping up with the latest fads on the Internets... like ass-wiping.

Dumbass.

12.08.10

By Chris Menning

Neutral

I'm not a puppet. I'm a REAL BOY!

12.08.10

By Mikey

Neutral

That's a question I could never ask.

12.10.10

By Pauly Seven

Neutral

Back in the late 90s, RE/Search published a book by Paul Spinrad called The RE/Search Guide to Bodily Fluids, which was based on (from memory, the book is in storage) Spinrad's thesis on bodily fluids, where he questioned 100 people at his university on a range of topics including... you guessed it, how they wipe. It also covers the 'scrunch or fold' argument, as well as almost everything you could want to know about the fluids of the human body.

It is a VERY interesting read, well worth finding a copy.