mark baumer
Remember that guy who walked across the country just for the heck of it? He's back, and now he's eating pizza...every day. It started like this:
I have found a new journey. It is circular. I tasted it and it tasted okay. My skills need improvement. I pressed my fingers into some dough and a hole formed. I put my mouth on the hole and then filled it with a pepperoni. Tomorrow I will eat a thing leftover in saran wrap in the fridge. The journey will improve. Please dont eat the saran wrap. I will be a good boy. I will not go to bed with greasy fingers.

Why would a person do such a thing? Read on to find out.
Why are you eating pizza every day?

Food consumption has a special place in my heart. I want to join the ranks of great American eaters such as Joey Chestnut and that 115 lb girl who ate the world's largest burger. Like anything anyone has ever done this, it is essentially a personal journey. Some days the pizzas feel like a two-dimensional globe that can predict my future. Other days there is a large space in my chest for love and I have to fill it with dough and cheese. In the end it will probably come down to money. I want those pizza dollars. Give me that green dough. Get paid. I want to be the first spokesman for the big three: Pizza Hut, Dominoes, Papa Johns/Pizzeria Uno. The Food Network should probably start Food Network 2 and let me be the host on all the shows.

How long do you plan to do this?

I will eat pizza today. I will eat pizza tomorrow. I hope I don't die on Sunday. If I do then I won't eat pizza on Monday.

Is this some kind of "statement" about "society"?

The only statement I can make about society is: "Everyone sucks but me and Tom Brady."
Mark Baumer
Are you making all the pizzas?

So far I've made at least one pizza a day. My new roommates have a bread maker that I use to make the dough. Thanks Noah, Patrick, Zach, and Kitty. They are my roommates. Kitty is an orange cat. He meows a lot and jumps on the counter. Sometimes I snap my fingers and Kitty runs away. Other times Kitty drinks from the kitchen faucet. Special thanks to the deceased poet Andre for his help in my early days of pizza making.

What's your favorite you've had so far?

My friend Dylan told me to make a lasagna pizza. I tried and failed. Dylan freaked out and threw the pizza in the backyard. He then bought me a 30" pizza from a place called Govenors which was really good. The failed lasagna pizza is still in the backyard. I think skunks might be feeding on it. The other night when I was walking home I heard a girl yelling that a skunk had sprayed her and she needed tomato juice. I guess my neighborhood has skunks.
Mark Baumer