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Readers, a modern plague is upon us. Children's toys have started swearing and leveraging death threats. You can't deny that this is happening!

For example, a Florida mother recently purchased her daughter an adorable Hannah Montana doll. Awww, so sweet. It's a party in the U.S.A. for sure! (shoot me now) Unfortunately (fortunately), the doll started cussing up a storm.

Check out the video of the doll screaming "f--cking pie," and even more swearing dolls, after the jump:



Yup, this woman is not an insane, delusional, prudish maniac. She is just a great mother. A++ in being a mother, non-crazy woman! The Disney Corporation clearly managed their billion dollar property by releasing a doll that says "f--cking pie." Not surprising, given that the manufacturers of Bratz have pulled a similar move:



But Hannah Montana and Bratz are not the worst offenders. Elmo has a rap sheet longer than Sesame Street's 40 year storied history (Sesame Street jokes, am I right?):


When will these corporate fat cats stop terrorizing our children?! Why must they continue to push their villainous messages onto the next generation? :sigh: I've always suspected that Elmo was a serial killer:


Chilling. But perhaps the worst offender is Po the bigoted Teletubby:


Horrific.