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In 2001, in his most serviceable moment, George W. Bush pardoned this turkey named Liberty. In return, the turkey pecked George W. Bush in the nuts. Together, they made the best Thanksgiving photo I have ever seen to this day. I believe the statute of limitations of this great turkey's pardon have long expired. Therefore, I intend to eat this very turkey named Liberty. Then, while I lay bloated and immobile on my mother's couch, I will mumble, "Bllluhhhhh!" But what I will mean is, "Liberty, I love you, you delicious hilarious bird." Happy Thanksgiving!