Sure, the holidays are about wholesomeness, family and the joy of giving -- but when it comes down to it, you just want to know that your holiday icon can kick ass.

Which is why Supermarkethq designer, Punkahontas, has created the Pirate Santa and Jewish Ninja (equipped with Star of David throwing stars) holiday cards!

Pirate Santa wishes you a happy new yeaaaaaarrrrr and Jewish Ninja a happy Hanunchucks, of course.

But what we're all secretly wondering is: where's our Kwanzaa robot?