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How many hours a day is a panda biologically forced to eat to survive? Like twenty-five? Twenty-six? If animalia's cutest binge eater can do kung fu, you know basically every other furry in the kingdom has some on-the-sly ninja skills. Ever see a cobra do the cobra? What about a bear do the bear? Probably, if you think about it! And you're about to see even more animals do even deadlier forms of kung fu in our KUNG FU ANIMALS GET-TO-KNOW-YOU MIXER & TOURNAMENT OF HONOR.

FIGHT 1 - Kitties vs Kitties
  • Sickest moves: The black runt with the paws of fury.
  • Sickest effects: Ring of fire superimposed in the second vid.
  • Just plain sick: Is the second one a cat fight or a lover's quarrel? They go form trysting in fairy dust to thunder clapping battle in a single jump cut. Dishonored! First cats win.


FIGHT 2 - Dog vs Dog
  • Sickest moves: The lightning fast claws on the Yorkie giving it to the frisbee.
  • Sickest effects: Bart, the kung fu poodle, who actually mauled that kid's face off after hearing 'Everybody Was Kung Fu Fighting' for the umpteenth time. Director had to go back and edit in a Pixar puppy in post production. Legitimate terrier takes it.


FIGHT 3 - Cow vs Pony
  • Sickest moves: Pony kicks a chicken onto the roof of a barn. No contest.


FIGHT 4 - Frogs vs Mantis
  • Sickest moves: Ninja mantis sneak attack. Leaping from your husband's finger to -- "AHH! AHH! Where'd he go? NO! THE BABY!"
  • Sickest effects: Wow, the frogs float around as if suspended by fine-wire harnesses, surrounded by a Hollywood green screen. CGI candy! Oh ... wait, it's water. DISQUALIFIED. Mantis secures a win, but the tournament cup goes to ... Ninja Panda. Not the cartoon, the genuine article ...

Cute gets you a long way at Urlesque.